because i swore i'd write SOMETHING tonight

to the tune of "if you're happy and you know it"

oh I take out my frustration on my skin
by my face you'll see what kind of shape i'm in
if i'm happy then you'll know it
and my face will surely show it
but for now i need a mask to hide the sin

seriously, i totally beat the hell out of my face just now obsessing in front of the mirror just to delay getting into bed because my head is so spinning with this day and my work and the bank and the buildings and my husband and. why do i do this? it looks very bad afterwards and takes three days to heal. and then i remember the wolfman children i just saw on the discovery channel, or was it tlc, but anyway it was the most disturbing and sad thing that i've seen in a long time. these children have a chromosomal disorder which makes hair, thick furry long hair, grow on their faces and bodies like the wolfman. and they are so painfully beautiful and sad and will live such a different and difficult life than me and my children without the wolfman disorder and i am so lucky that nothing should ever drive me to pick at my skin or even bother looking twice in the mirror, right? its good skin, mostly. and i am lucky. i will treat it nicely tomorrow.